I had another dose of a funny and smart, kiddy comment from one of my first grade:

Teacher JM, bakit may balbas ka sa kilikili?

Teacher JM, why does your armpits have a mustache?

I posted this comment in Facebook where I received around 30 likes and around 24 comments (excluding my own, silly)–the most likes and commeI got that has something to say directly about the shout-out and not as mere replies to a previous comment, which eventually leads to the mutation of  the comment feature into a chat room.

Aside from this witty comment, I also got a not-so-good comment this time coming from my supervising teacher.

“…you don’t seem you these past few days.”

Shucks. I have started pretty well in this practicum, gaining more and more experience each day. I have no excuse to lag behind deadlines and requirements. Now I am very well aware of one of my weaknesses, I am not YET that good with the non-teaching work–meeting deadlines, organizing things and what have you.

These all started when I went to Dagupan to present a paper which made me miss a couple of classes and miss time to check papers and make lesson plans. Now I am falling behind. My  professor reminded me of my good standing, how much more I can improve, and how I can’t afford to lag and settle for mediocrity with less than to months to go and an upcoming job interview for a much coveted spot in the UPIS faculty.

She is absolutely right when she told me

JM, sayang naman ang galing mo magturo kung sabog ka naman sa materials at sa organization.

Ouch.

Mister Pedagog will regroup and strike back with full force. I promise I will.

But for now, let me end with this picture I took of the shadow puppets my class watched and was able to try earlier. It was a great puppet show. For more information, or if you want to invite the Anino Shadow Collective, the check their website at http://anino.sining.net/

I am missing my own group–Alitaptap Storytellers Philippines. Wish I could join them again real soon.

I grew up spending most of my Sundays with my family. We would watch movies, eat out, browse in bookstores, do grocery shopping and the like. Having gone to college though lessened the frequency we get to spend Sundays like these. This is why last Sunday was really fun. After hearing mass in the morning we went to Alabang Town Center, where we looked at books, ate at TGI Friday’s (had three kinds of pasta plus my favorite fisherman’s platter) and watched The Princess and the Frog–which I really loved if only for rewarding the innocence of an earnest dreamer.

Then after resting for a bit, my parents had me, my sister and my cousin (all celebrating our birthdays this month) blindfolded and was driven by our dad somewhere where we were “tortured” (i.e. water squirts, myster objects and smells, etc). After some time we were asked to remove our blindoflds only to find ourselves amidst our friends’ greetings and our family’s love and happiness.

It was a simple yet very meaningful get together over chicken, liempo, pizza, siomai and cake. I love my family and my friends. It makes me want to take more risks to reach whatever it is I want to reach knowing they will be there when I’m ready to try “jumping of the edge never knowing if there’s solid ground below…or hell to pay” (Dion, Taking Chances).

Life is good.

With the remarkable number of people who greeted me in Facebook, I can’t help but wonder if it was because of the many people I met last year or because of the birthday reminding feature of Facebook. Neverthelss, to all who remembered my 21st birthday, MARAMING SALAMAT PO!.

I also would want to share this birthday cake my Dad bought for me. It is really funny how the ordinal “21st” was written as “21th.” Despite my Dad’s insisting that this was the fault of the Red Ribbon person, the rest of the family is convinced it was him who made the mistake. LOL.

I love my Dad. I love my family. They will always be the best birthday present I’ll ever recieve (together with my best friend, and perhaps someone to love. LOL)

Today, i received my first scheduled teaching demonstration/job interview.

UP Integrated School: 16 February 2009

Life is getting more and more real, serious, grown-up. Guess I really am not living in Neverland after all.

Birthdays have never appealed to me. This is definitely not because of age as it has never scared me, but perhaps because of the minimal effect and affect it really has to the world.

Nonetheless, turning 21 seems to have this great impact on me as I am officially an adult–by means of age anyway. In about a few months I will be bidding my undergraduate life goodbye as I become part of the labor force of the country. Suddenly, people are asking me to pass resumes, apply for an SSS number, get my TIN, finally secure a driver’s license and what have you.

I am starting to miss those days when all that are  asked of me are good grades and a kind heart.

Aside from these responsibilities my age have incurred for me, I realized that I need to be more responsible for my self and more true to  my principles. People have been challenging a lot of my ideals and beliefs and I noticed that I sometimes cringe in shame. I cringe because I do not have concrete proofs to support my claims of idealism in teaching, monogamy, love, service and faith.

I find it sad that people keep reminding me of reality and pragmatics with regards to these things. Sometimes i get the feeling they won’t even give me a chance.

• Teaching is passion, but it also is a profession which means there is money in this field and you just have to know where to find it.
• Then again, I was brought up believing that money isn’t everything. It controls a hell lot of things in this world, but it isn’t everything.
• Homosexual, monogamous love exists. Despite statistics telling me otherwise, I will continue to believe there are gay guys out there who don’t succumb to the idea that we are simply too sexual to control lust and settle for monogamy. AND FOR CRYING OUT LOUD I AM NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT MORALITY.
• Logic says: If there are gay guys who enjoy casual sex, then there are gay guys who DON’T enjoy casual sex, specially for those who are hoping for a loving, monogamous, more-than-sex, relationships.
• SEX ISN’T EVERYTHING OK! (I am shouting at the top of my lungs for this!)
• The price of a venti, iced green tea latte in soymilk (my favorite drink from Starbucks) can feed a poor family for a day. With this, my love for conversations can happen  some place else–top of a hill, at a park, a carinderia, top of a car’s hood while looking up the stars, while jogging, at a garden and so on (Starbucks-ing ain’t bad from time to time though).
• I am responsible for my own actions and cannot and will not blame any one else.
• GOD loves homosexuals as he loves heteros (actually he might even love gay people more for some reason )

I am now 21. I can die tomorrow or in a while. While I am still alive, I have so much to do, so much to prove. Try stopping me and I’ll unleash all my motivation, all my love, all my hopes and dreams, all my optimism to protect my self.

I am now 21 and I have a life to live–may it last for only a while or longer.

Arrived in Manila Saturday night after a three-day conference with the Reading Association of the Philippines.

The presentation really went well. The introduction was great, the lesson proper went well, the audience response was just the way I like it (with challenging questions and commendations). The number of particiapants who chose our session was relatively big–nerve-wrecking at the beginning, ego-boosting at the ending.

Got to meet a lot of people who yet again added to my dream of becoming the best teacher i can be for my future students. Among them were:

• Ms. Ani Almario (publisher of Adarna, and a prospect “boss” should I try to apply in Raya)
• Dr. Virgilio Almario (our former Dean in my former college)
• Dr. Alon (who has now adopted me as her son as well LOL)
• Dr. Cutiongco
• Dr. Lina Diaz De Rivera
• Dr. Hidalgo
• Dr. Nemenzo (who triggered in me my long forgotten love for math)
• Efren Penaflorida (wish I asked him about Angel )
• Dr. Therese Bustos (one of the coolest SPED faculty in our college)
• Ms. Bong (the president of Kuting “mga kwentista ng chikiting” and author)
• A LOT OF OTHER TEACHERS: OLDER, YOUNGER, WHATEVER who taught me a lot just by conversing with them. (There were some cute teachers i must say)

Was able to do a little shopping in one of the markets in Dagupan where I was able to buy fish (big milk fish), daing na bangus, Lumpiang shanghai bangus, and tupig (a suman variety). I even had to buy a styro cooler to bring home the fresh fish.

The Dagupan experience was great. Learned a lot from the places i visited, the people I met, and the things I experienced. Among them are:

• public school system and the private school system has a big disparity between them in ways one can only imagine.
• know the fare in the city to avoid over-charging tricycle drivers
• never judge a place simply by its picture because it might actually be better once you see it (jus tlike Inn Asia Hotel)
  

  My home in Dagupan

• I can’t directly apply into a public school as they require a license and that to begin with it might be impractical
• “The rich are getting richer and the poor are getting poorer” and that we must act now to lessen this great divide the people of this country is experiencing (Padilla, 2010).
• Mathematics is not just about technique, and formulas, and equations but rather a language one must comprehend to be able to appreciate and even love (Nemenzo, 2010).
• Our first languages are THAT important. English is not the ONLY language.
• Comprehension goes a long way
• It is important to stay grounded and know who we are to people in our lives
• These don’t even include the technicalities, techniques, strategies, theories I learned so that amounts to a lot.

Happy Moments.

Arrived in Dagupan around noon where after registering, I went straight to Inn Asia Hotel for a quick lunch and shower before the the one pm conference. The place was not quite what I expected it to be. Friends know how i tend to expect every province to be as “rural” as a place can be. Not because I condescend being a manilenyo but simply because I want them to be laid back and “rural.”

Both of my parents grew up in Manila (San Juan and Paranaque) that I never had that schema of a province since we didn’t go to any. Though we usually go on outings and out-of-town trips, it still feels different when growing up friends and classmates would talk about their vacations in their respective probinsyas with me having nothing to share at all.

Dagupan is a city to begin with. Even with my expectations, I knew that it is slowly “urbanizing” as a city. The moment I got off the van at CSI Stadia for the Reading Association of the Philippines (RAP) Midyear demofest where I will be presenting a Lesson Plan and its underpinnings with my friend Abi, a mall with National Bookstore and McDonalds welcomed me. Funny. Nevertheless I am enjoying the place as it still has remnants of the laidback pace of a province–I like it.

The conference started with Efre Penaflorida giving an opening speech. I wanted a picture with him but ended up taking pictures of people with him. But the truth is, I felt his speech was somewaht mechanical maybe since he probably has been giving it since he was awared CNN 2009 Hero of the year–i guess I can’t blame him.

Will be preparing for our presentation tonight. For now, I’ll be enjoying my chicken barbecue and romantic imaginations with someone. LOL

First time two students asked me to go with him and her to the bathroom beacuse they had a poop alert.

• Panic. What to do. Apparently, one of them knows how to use the toilet paper so I simply had to accompany him and give him moral support from the shame defecating in school brings children. Then, the other one being a girl was accompanied by one of the school’s aides instead. Eventually, I know I will have to wash one of my young student’s poop holes. To begin with, I am a second dad to them.

First time to make a serious resume for a “real” job.

• I thought job applications happen after graduation, but I learned that teachers have to apply earlier if they want real students to be present during their demo teaching. Otherwise, the supervising teachers and future employers will be the ones to act as students which may not show your skills in interacting with real students. With this,  I reviewed my life as an education undergraduate, checked what I did as a student, and created my first “serious” resume.

First time to realize things will get more “adult in nature” from here on.

• In about three months, I will be part of the labor force of this country. I won’t wake up thinking about papers, readings and crushes in classes. I will wake up one day thinking what I’ll do in my job to make the most out of each day.

First time to realize that the song Taking Chances forgot to warn me about what it really means to take a chance.

• I’d rather be shush about this one. Ranting or overthinking about it defies the whole concept of taking chances in life as a whole anyway.

We have finally passed the lesson plan paper my friend and I will be presenting in the Midyear Demofest of the Reading Association of the Philippines (RAP) this coming January 21-23, 2010 at Dagupan City. Originally scheduled last November (the conference was moved because of the storm Ondoy), this midyear demofest is where lectures, studies, papers and lesson plans are presented for the development of the reading education in the country and to be a presenter in this event will teach any aspiring teacher a lot about literacy–specially for undergraduates like me who have so much more to learn.

This is my world. Well, at least this is what I want it to become–a world of teaching children and studying more to teach them even better.

I have come to realize that this may be my calling and that anything that will come from here onwards will have to complement that. I can’t be whimsical anymore. I can’t be selfish and think simply of myself. To people I will meet from here on, this is who I am, this is who Mister Pedagog is. Mister Pedagog would love to share this with everyone, even with that special someone (if ever he finds him).

I will be a teacher, a good teacher.

As for the picture: lives are like cups of tea (or coffee) in mugs. It would be nice to see another mug right beside you, a mug that complements your own mug. And when you find that mug (or when it finds you), you can take sips from each other’s mug and enjoy life and love.

I wonder who would want to take a sip from mine?

The difficult is never the same with the impossible

A couple of days ago, Proffesor Agcaoili, a visiting professor for the University of Hawaii, gave a lecture on multi-lingual education and he told me straight to my face that the problem with me is I equate difficulty to impossibility.

And so I began thinking…

My roomate, Kervin, gave me a bottle of Good Shepherd’s Ube which i brought to class to enjoy and share. As i was listening to the lecture, I happily ate the halaya (ube) in my spoon as I thought more about what Professor Agcaoili made me realize. Since it became clear I wanted to become a teacher, people keep telling me that I am such an idealist and that I should stay grounded with my hopes and aspirations. But I always think, hoping for something idealistic is not bad.  And when I heard this from my professor, I just had more hope–batteries recharged to aspire and dream and hope and hope and hope some more.

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I am having difficulties with being sweet while being autoritative with my first graders. Just yesterday, my lesson (where I made this large water cycle using the playground as the canvass) started to have problems when some of my students mixed my being sweet and caring like a brother or a father with my being a teacher.

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I have problems with choosing the right words to say that I end up being unecessarily verbose. Will have to improve on this.

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Last night, I finsihed my first five (5) Kilometer run with a friend. Afterwhich, we went to the highest point in Metro Manila where the UP observatory is located. The sky was relatively clear that I wanted to try the telescope which was, unfortunately, closed. We ended up chatting with one of the members of the UP Astronomical Society (UP AstroSoc), learning interesting facts about the observatory.

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I can’t remember when I last used the word “happy-scared” but I think I want to use it again and just deal with the scared part

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I’m learning a lot these days. I am learning to be brave. I am learning to hope some more. I am learning to put down some of my defenses. I am learning the fact that hurt is part of life. I am learning that love, too is part of it. I am learning, learning, learning, then I think I am falling.